Willing Victim

Willing victim, what do I mean by this. I know that from the articles I read online that the term willing victim is controversial. I am a teacher and this is a teaching website so I feel that this is a relevant topic. The dictionary says this: 

1. a person who suffers from a destructive or injurious action or agency: a victim of an automobile accident.

2. a person who is deceived or cheated, as by his or her own emotions or ignorance, by the dishonesty of others, or by some impersonal agency: a victim of misplaced confidence; the victim of a swindler; a victim of an optical illusion.

3. a person or animal sacrificed or regarded as sacrificed: war victims.

4. a living creature sacrificed in religious rites.

In metaphysics or the self-help field, teachers try to impress on you the importance of words and how you use them. Because of this, it is challenging to express a topic without offending anyone. Also, I do not want to give words power over me or my thoughts.

So for this conversation, I will say this, there are terrible things happening in this world against each other, animals, and our planet. I can not fix the world alone but I can try and make your existence better. With social media and the short excerpts, the true meaning of what we teach is often overlooked. I recently read an article about a self-help teacher being chastised for comments that I know were not fully understood by those who commented.

What is a Willing Victim?

Someone who chooses to allow their present peace of mind to be affected by a past experience. I am not saying to ignore your negative experience but to take control of it. 12 Step programs teach you to let go and let God and to take actions that will empower you. 

Once we label something it becomes real to us. It stops us from seeing alternatives. This is the power of words and thoughts. We make conscious decisions about something, attach a belief to it and it is so real that it is hard to see past it. We choose to become willing victims by our beliefs and our values. We find it hard to see any alternatives because of this. I believe this is why it becomes challenging to overcome our negative past and to choose a more positive future. Please remember that our thoughts and words are important. We live in a world of cause and effect. We can not escape our consequences but we can create new ones and stop old attitudes.


Tony Robbins is a self-help teacher and a World authority on leadership psychology and these are a few quotes:

“Things do not have meaning. We assign meaning to everything.”

“We will act consistently with our view of who we truly are, whether that view is accurate or not.”

“A real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken a new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided.”

“Your life changes the moment you make a new, congruent, and committed decision.”

“Your past does not equal your future.”

To put this in a easy context, I have been hurt as a child and adult. I have hurt people in the past without understanding that I was doing it. I had to decide if the things that happened to me were going to continue to ruin my life and spiritual growth, or was I going to change my thinking. I changed my life, my friends that were not for my higher good and to this day continue to have amazing spiritual growth. 


"We cannot solve life's problems except by solving them. This statement may seem idiotically tautological or self-evident, yet it is seemingly beyond the comprehension of much of the human race. This is because we must accept responsibility for a problem before we can solve it. We cannot solve a problem by saying "It's not my problem." We cannot solve a problem by hoping that someone else will solve it for us. I can solve a problem only when I say "This is my problem and it's up to me to solve it." But many, so many, seek to avoid the pain of their problems by saying to themselves: "This problem was caused me by other people, or by social circumstances beyond my control, and therefore  it is up to other."

The Road Less Traveled, 25th Anniversary Edition  M. SCOTT PECK, M.D.

Nobody wants to be a victim. I know that we all want to have peace, prosperity, good health, and healthy relationships. For us not to become a willing victim we must be open-minded and willing to change our thinking, our way of doing certain things, and be open to difficult change.

Please learn to be honest and gentle with yourself and change will happen. We can not change the past but we can decide our future.

Be kind, loving and, diligent in all you do. 

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